In my job, I work with people who want to affect change in their lives. As a counselor, I can point you toward thousands of articles, in which you can follow 10 steps to this and 7 steps to that. I can link you to blog and books and podcasts (which I am freakishly fond of) but I am going to let you in on a little secret.
There are just two steps to reaching and all goals.
Yes, 2. Zwei. Deux. Dos.
If you are truly ready to change your life, here you go. This one is on the house.
(Shameless plug alert – if you are still in need of a little assistance, you can always reach me for a virtual appt. at HigherHopesCounseling.com.)
Assuming you are wanting to move forward and not remain stuck let’s dive right in. No time like the present, right? First, envision your goal. Where are we going? To which harbor are we headed. I need you to close your eyes and see your goal, draw it out, write it out, speak it, whatever your style of getting it out there is- do it now. Do you want to lose weight, gain confidence, stop negative self-talk, walk away from an unhealthy relationship? Where ever we are going on this journey, I need you to envision it.
Now get yourself something on which you like to make lists and we are going to make two lists.
List #1- to meet your goal, what do you need to do MORE of?
Example – I want to move away from a friend who takes a lot from me and never gives in return.
So, on my list, I write:
- I want to meet more new people,
- I want to spend more time with my family and
- find more classes or activities on my own, without this friend.
It is important that you give yourself real options and don’t overwhelm yourself. Pick two to three and make sure they are realistic. We have to move away from fictional thinking about our lives if we are going to see and be a part of real change.
Now, List #2 – make a short list of two to three things that you want to do LESS of.
On my list, I could write:
- I want to call this friend less often,
- I could make sure to go out with her less, and
- I could design my week to have less friend time in general as I make time for the family instead.
Then, and here is the hard work, go do more and less. That is it. So it really isn’t that hard at all. Yes, there are other things we can do, but essentially this is the core of all change. Do more of what is good for you, less of what isn’t. When we are faced with changing our lifestyle and habits, trying to think through so many maneuvers can be very difficult. Focusing on my Less and More Technique puts you on the path to immediate change. These are changes to can feel right away, which makes the immediate gratification need in all of us very happy.
These baby, bite-sized nuggets will move you forward to tangible changes that you can see, feel and appreciate in your life. If you do them long enough, if you don’t cave to temptation or guilt, you can achieve whatever you set your mind to do. If you do experience a setback, then just re-apply your Less & More once you have picked yourself up and are ready to try again. Revisit your simple lists and get back on track.
I would really love to hear what you are trying to accomplish in this life of yours. Don’t be afraid to mail me or to comment below. We can be sending you light and love and surround you with prayers for the road. And as you progress, share your journey so that others that may need your inspiration can run alongside you!